Jeff Brown

Improvement of Emotional Health is for Everyone



Posted: Thursday, February 28, 2008

by
Inner Projection

Emotionally, most have at least some small chinks in the armor. Others, however, need to work on major alterations or replacing the suit entirely. For this minority, extensive one on one attention by a well trained and highly specialized practitioner is necessary, which goes beyond the scope of this article. The majority, those who are "functionally emotional" (are able to provide for their basic needs and / or the needs of others) will profit most from this article.

We all have "emotional issues" to some degree. Now some may not believe this to be true but upon further examination (and this is where most people fail--to examine themselves in a consistent, honest manor) everyone will find weaknesses. If you don't, and you are of such great strength you can handle any crises (extreme emotional situation) with little or no negative effect and can simply dust off your red, blue, and yellow spandex suit and fly away unharmed, red cape flapping, then you, my friend, are obviously from another planet. Therefore, I will refer you to your own planet's literature for assistance, that is if you need any. However, we non-Kryptonians do have the potential to handle catastrophe with greater success than most of us do but few realize this. Why?

Well, the key is to work toward eliminating weaknesses. Notice I didn't say eliminate. Not possible for most earthbound humans, but with great effort, time, training, and knowledge one can advance closer to perfection. You may be asking yourself "why?" at this point. Why should I?

The answer: to be a stronger force in your life and the lives of others. If you want to be happier, healthier, wealthier, and wiser, then you need to do this. Nevertheless, if you are happy most of the time or don't desire greater happiness in your life (and potentially to project that happiness onto others) then you can stop reading. For everyone else, here's what I'm trying to say in a nutshell.

" The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing and becomes nothing.

He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn and feel and grow and love and live " (Buscaglia).

To find greater happiness usually takes great risk. But if you are willing to risk and find greater happiness, do you have an obligation to share it? Well, according to scientists, energy (read happiness) is never created nor destroyed. It's always out there; you just have to clear up the blocks (emotional) that are inhibiting you from lassoing the sucker and going for a joyride. But once you latch onto it, there is a universal principle that says you gotta share. You really have no choice. Here's what the sharers are talking about.

" We cannot hold a torch to light another's path without brightening our own."-- Ben Sweetland

" Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared ."- Buddha

" You find yourself refreshed in the presence of cheerful people. Why not make an honest effort to confer that pleasure on others? Half the battle is gained if you never allow yourself to say anything gloomy. "-- Lydia M. Child

" Realize that true happiness lies within you. Waste no time and effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world outside. Remember that there is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself."-- Og Mandino

" If you want happiness for an hour, take a nap. If you want happiness for a day, go fishing. If you want happiness for a year, inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime, help somebody."-- Chinese proverb

OK, so I threw a whole bunch of other quotes at you. I couldn't help it. I love these quotes. But there's a lot here, so let me take them one at a time. Let's go with Sweetland's quote first. Basically, like I said, if you get happy, it's difficult to keep that happiness (energy) from latching onto others who are happy or looking for happiness. It is this energy that is the essential energy of the universe, for it is not the inert or unhappiness that rules. All that which takes from you is of the negative. Here's a short list to consider, if you think you are void of any need for change. Are you any of these?: irresponsible, irritable, critical, impatient, dishonorable, sad, regretful, angry, resentful, fearful, bitter, prideful, self-willed, controlling.

Of course we're talking in the extreme here. We all have practiced these negatives from time to time, but if any of these dominate your life and do not allow you to live a happy or joyful life, then you need to do some work. And I can tell you now as I told you before, that's most of us.

Let's look at Mandino's quote now. He not only tells us to get happiness and share it (remember that lesson on sharing in Kindergarten? it applies here), but the key point he makes is that it "lies inside you."

To eamine this point, here's a scenario. Two men stuck in Los Angeles traffic. Notice how these two people encounter the same situation but their responses are at polar opposites.

First man: "Man, this traffic sucks. Every damn day of my stinking life I'm stuck in a fricken traffic jam. What gives? Twenty years now! When is the city going to do something about this?" Another driver pulls in front of him. "Damn, here's another idiot trying to cut me off. Thinks he's going to get somewhere." Sticking his head out the window "Hey idiot! Get a clue!"

Second man: "This is great. I was just in the middle of listening to this CD on how to cut your taxes for your business so you can make more money and if I arrived at my appointment on time I'd have to listen to it later. Excellent. Hey, did you know that Bill Gates said knowing the basics about tax laws is the secret to his success? Learned that one day in the car. Hell, if it wasn't for these long drives I'd still be stuck in a 9 to 5 paying 50% of my money to the government. Now that I learned how to set up a home business I've cut my taxes to 9% and write everything off. It's great."

See what I mean? So next time you're yelling and complaining, as Mya Angelou says, either stop complaining or change things, or, as I say, overcome your emotional issues. It really comes down to either accepting things the way they are or doing some work and making some well-needed changes.

The last point made by Child and the Chinese proverb is that once you find happiness you got to give it away. Don't horde it. Well, you can, but eventually it will backfire and bring back that negative energy. Basic principle of the universe regarding happiness is that you've got to share it. Most do. When great joy and abundance hits you, also known as giddiness, you have to actually go against your will not to share.

Bottom line, we all have work to do. The questions is will you do what it takes to improve and overcome your limitations or will you sit back in your comfortably numb misery and convince yourself that your lack of current fulfillment and joy is "Just the way it is"? Here's where the majority resides. However, do you desire to stay down there with them or get up, rise up and find the energy, the joy and happiness that you deserve? And while you're up there, maybe you can take a look down and extend a joy-encrusted hand in their direction for some lifting and encouraging of your own. God bless.
Jeff is a Career, Life, & Mentor coach & CEO of  www.InnerProjection.com: working with students and parents using the proprietary Success, Design and Preparation system creating a plan to ensure his clients are of the 30% of college grads who don't waste 10 to 15 years or leave 100s of thousands of dollars on the table.

Prior to owning Inner Projection, Jeff worked as a computer programmer and in tech. support, but hated it enough to move from his home in Connecticut to do stand up comedy in Boston where he worked with such comics as Bill Burr, Dan Cook, and Billy Martin and wrote for people like Mz. Michigan who needed material for her ventriloquism act. He then moved to Los Angeles to do more stand up, but found being a coach & college instructor more rewarding. He's married with 3 children.
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Top-level comments on this article: (2 total)
» left by susan thom
from nj 3 years 319 days ago.
hi jeff, excellent article. i really enjoyed :) it. it was interesting and filled with good information. and oh so true. in answer to your question, i choose (on most days) to: "get up, rise up and find the energy, the joy and happiness that you deserve." thanks for sharing, best regards, sue
» left by 3 years 319 days ago.
Suesan, So glad you enjoyed. May the sun shine on all you shine on. Peace.
» left by Jeannie Walker
from Van Nuys, Ca 3 years 312 days ago.
Well Jeff, I thought you vanished, but you're back! The disappearing act has brought you closer to the truth of human existence in this dog- eat -dog world; accentuate the positive, remove the negative, give with a clean heart, and never give up on yourself or anyone else, for that matter. Keep a smile in your heart and on your lips no matter where you are or what you do. The goodness of life can come to you easier when you smile, smile, smile. Thank you for this message. It sure made me research alot of religions and theories to live by like Daoism, Buddhism, Confucianism, Judism, Christianity, and the Kabbalah. Wow, you woke up my interest! Can I give more? I do believe I can. Jeanne Walker
» left by 3 years 312 days ago.
Jeanne, Glad I got you thinking. I recently went to a wealth seminar with my wife in Anaheim, and the speaker was amazing. He held the audience captive for two eight hour days. Difficult to do just for a few hours, never mind days. He was captivating because he was funnny, giving out important, can I say, life saving information, but most of all he was interesting because he was interested in and stimulated by learninng. The more we learn, the more insightful and interesting we become, but most of all, the more useful we become to others. Why give jus to ourselves? That's boring. Have a great day.
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